It’s Not Me, It’s You
Hello out there reader. Today in my world, I’m rocking a bit of headache, am still having difficulty using an arm at capacity due to a pulled muscle and as is normal, a couple of toes are struggling to function properly without some type of pain. Otherwise, the day has been, in the most general sense, as kind as a day can be I suppose. Before I forget to mention it, thanks for checking in here and reading.
Now onto the meat of the post with no delay. Some of you who may be reading this post right this very moment, have not quite understood what is available to you within this blog. To make my point, how many original songs created, recorded and shared for free by me do you have access to as long as you have access to the internet? In how many sports have I been a goalie? How many blogs do I currently have in my personal “blogverse”? What is my current method of earning a living wage? Who was my guitar teacher? Have I ever been out of the United States? How long was my daily commute to work at this time in 2010?
Here’s my point: Most, if not all, of those who are now reading this can’t answer most, if not all, of the previous questions. Those who can answer some, likely can’t answer the rest just from general knowledge of who I am. A few, an awareness of which I most certainly have, can answer the questions, but the probability those rare few could do it without searching a bit is extremely low, if not zero. Here’s where my thoughts about this have led me thus far; if the people who contact me for whatever reason, in any manner whatsoever, prefer to foist their idea of who I am upon me without even the slightest regard for anything detailed within any blog in which my thoughts have been shared and are still available for public consumption on the internet, communication will cease. There will be no exceptions. None.
My personal tolerance for other people’s lack of respect, appreciation, understanding of something other than the inner ego, habitual cessation of even vague attempts at brain activity has been reached. It is at its full, complete end. Worthiness is well within each and every human’s control. If the clues contained within anything I have written, said, sung or tweeted aren’t good enough for you, there is nothing I can do to change what you will not take an active part in, hence, the words you send out to me, no matter what form, are of little value compared to how you have acted.
Stop e-mailing me to ask me to put your links on my blogs. Stop e-mailing me to find how I am if you cannot handle the answer. Stop trying to get me sell things for you. Of all the things I’ve noticed in my life time, it’s a distinct hankering for people from all walks of life, most often strangers to me in almost every way, to make rather strong attempts at getting me to “sell” something for them. I’ve had a Rainbow vacuum “system” representative literally register me as a “salesperson” without my knowledge or consent, then lie straight to my face about the reason I should come into the office. I was told I had won a free Rainbow, but when I went to retrieve my prize, I was fully registered as a participant in the “sales” learning session and shown my “territory”. There were no other “prize winners”. There was only a very eager individual who went so far as to boast about “hooking” the best sales person Rainbow would ever see. Imagine, if you will, how it went when I promptly turned and walked out the door. I received several angry phone calls from the individual who assumed he’d “hooked” me informing me how stupid I was to pass up such a great opportunity. My youth at that time prompted me to actually reply. My reply was less than pleasant and is not fit for repeating in a public venue.
Once, while working and going to school, there was a friendly middle-aged woman who often talked to me on breaks since we typically worked the same shift. I was in my early twenties and hadn’t yet caught on to certain “tells” present in almost all humans giving insight into their actual intentions, so when she gave me the “scoop” about how she needed to work her shift, because she could not afford her car payments, but that her husband had to go a work function that same night and needed someone else to go with him to help him take notes and other assorted trivia. Looking back, I didn’t volunteer to go along, but after she brought it up, knowing my schedule did not include working that night and then pleaded with me to help her out by going with her husband to the work function, I skeptically did agree after asking many questions. She had acceptable answers to my questions, so I was put at ease.
When I met her husband and travelled to this “work function”, my awareness of how well my co-worker told me fibs versus how well her husband was able to maintain a false pretense became evident before we arrived at the function. I knew before we signed-in that my co-worker had managed to lure me into something “sales” related. My hunch was right. It turned out my co-worker’s husband was trying to find other people to become a part of a pyramid scheme that involved selling products from the home that were “environmentally friendly”. When the “function” was over, I told her husband as soon as we were in the parking lot that I don’t know why anyone would want to buy a bunch of products, then sell them to their friends and family, not knowing if those products were what they seemed or if those products would become dust collecting wastes of space in a basement, never to see the light of day again.
It was clear to him I was not only annoyed to be duped into attending such an event, but that I was not going to bite. He discussed everything, but the “function” on the ride home. When I next had a shift with my co-worker, she fervently inquired about how everything went and when she could expect me to get some more people on board. I don’t know what conversation she had with her husband, but I can assure you, once my co-worker and I were alone in the break room, I let loose. The way I work, I wasn’t outright mean and I did what I could to be nice about firmly stating my discontent, but that was not getting through. For four straight shifts, I tried every way in which I could think to tell my co-worker I was not interested short of planting myself in her face and screaming it at her. Sadly, she refused to take that as an answer so I told her one last time that I was not happy she “tricked” me and I was definitely not interested, then asked her to drop it. She did not. I requested a transfer to a different location since the manager felt she couldn’t require my co-worker to stop bugging me about selling products not related to work.
There are so many examples of people going to great lengths to cajole me into “selling” something for them, I could type for days on end and still not cover them all. The moral of this post: STOP. Just stop. If I believe in something, it should be obvious. I will “sell” what I believe in for free, all day, everyday. I’m not a sales person. I’m a believer. Belief in something, someone, a team, a thought, a product, a tangible, an intangible is its own best marketer. You, who feel I am your “perfect” sales person, don’t want me to “sell” your “product” if I don’t believe in it anyway. You will have no “sales”.
So STOP thinking it’s okay to expect other people to “like” something, endorse something, support something of which they know very little, if anything at all, and that they can’t, due to lack of actual information, or don’t believe in. STOP. Start taking pride in what you are “selling”. Start giving a crap about quality. Start caring about the fact that a “consumer” is not just a human with money, but a human who lives and breathes just as you do. If you want a better economy, start concentrating on BETTER, not MORE.
For now, I will leave you with a steadfast statement that has not changed since I began journaling online in 2000 (maybe a bit earlier, the memory isn’t quite what it used to be), I LOVE HOCKEY. I LOVE MUSIC. I AM MIA. WHO ARE YOU? DO YOU KNOW? If you don’t know, or you aren’t as sure of who you are as I am, are trying to find out?
If you are afraid to do something, you don’t know how to do something, you want something, but you cannot have it without me, how long do you think I will be there, standing in front of you taking care of all the dirty work before I request that you either stand alongside me or you, at the very least, do everything you can, while I do for you, to make sure I do not take so many “hits” that I can no longer stand at all. Who will stand in front of you when I cannot? How many people willing to stand in front of you will go down as you let them do what you will not do? At some point, no one will stand in front of you. Stand together, even if one must be in front, because everything you do to help the person in front of you keeps the both of you standing for much, much longer doesn’t it?
Figure it out. Be afraid, but just keep trying. I’ve never asked a single human for anything other than that. Ever. My standards are high, but they are not impossible. Nothing really is. I hold myself to the exact same standard. If I do not rise to my own standards, I recognize it and move forward. Do you? I understand “work in progress.” You and I are works in progress. Everyone who has ever know me, even casually, has gotten lattitude, because I understand. I do, however, need to sense actual WORK and actual PROGRESS. I’m not complicated.
No one is perfect. No one. Not you. Not me. Not trying to be the best person you can be, however, is not something I care to support any further. You are not the reason the sun is in the sky and the wind blows. WE are all in this together. Get used to it.
peace-mia firstname.lastname@example.org @creasesinger
Everything matters. Everything is relative to love. TRY.